How to train and domesticate those adorable squirrels!

Don't even try. Bobby got mange, me and Deborah haven't slept in weeks, what with all the screeching in the walls. Bastards ate my secret stash of Frerro Rocher and Deb gave me the third degree when she found the wrappers. Hypertenstion, my ass. Maybe if she'd stop nagging me about "sat fats" and give up the biscuit once in a while, I wouldn't be so goddamn tense.